by
Sacha Cohen
-- The Setting: A dotcom conference room, Anywhere, USA
-- The Players: A
marketing manager, a content manager, and a programmer
Marketing manager: I just wanted to sync-up on our pre-IPO,
B-to-B PR campaign. Obviously, we need a little mindshare and I’m
interested in getting your ideas about how we can make the site stickier.
I’ve brought you all together because I think there’s some synergy here.
Your thoughts?
Programmer: I think I can help streamline our
company’s visionary technologies and enable more a more robust e-commerce
solution. I’m just not sure if I’ve got the bandwidth -- let me see if I
can get buy-in from the folks in IT.
Content Manager: That
sounds good, but what about our innovative, interactive content? Isn’t that
what’s getting all the eyeballs?
Marketing manager: We’re not
doing away with interactive content, don’t worry. I just wanted to make sure
we’re all on the same page. I want to make sure it’s a win-win for everyone.
No idea what this conversation was about? You’re not alone. Drop into any
Internet company and chances are, you’ll hear similar conversations and terms
like brick-and-mortar, synergy, viral marketing, and
scalability.
In case you’re not familiar with all the jargon being
bandied about, this article should get you up to speed than you can say
"sync-up."
Bandwidth: Traditionally, this meant the amount of data that a
transmission line could carry, usually measured in bits per second (bps).
However, this term now is used to refer to the resources/time/capability/ability
that is available.
Example: Do you have the bandwidth to get XYZ
project done by Tuesday?
What It Really Means
Chris Heuer, Chief Gadget Guru at Infoapps.com likens today’s tech and
business jargon to pop singles: "they work great until they get overplayed by the local DJs, and every now and again, someone gets hooked on a beat and then we
all get sick of it."
"The biggest problem is not the buzzwords themselves, as they often convey
complex thoughts very quickly among people who know what they mean and serve as
a kind of filter to determine how wired someone is to conventional wisdom. The
real problem with buzzwords lies in the poseurs of the world that hear a new
phrase and start spewing it to sound cool without ever understanding what it
means," he says.
Here’s a list of what these buzzwords can really mean.
Integration: Synonyms: Costly, expensive, time consuming, most likely
impossible.
Let’s take that offline: I don’t want the other
people in this meeting to see me screaming at you. Mindshare: What the Klingons do with your brain
after they split your head open.
Pre-IPO: We can’t pay what you’re worth, but if
you believe our fantasies about getting rich off this, you’ll take the
offer anyway.
Robust offering: A product or service that is so complex it will never
really do what it says it can.
Strategic Fit: We will buy you, sell your assets and fire most of your
employees.
Synergy: When someone wants to do business with you but does not know why
or how you will benefit, they often cite the ethereal and nonexistent
"synergy."
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Buy-in: Consensus; agreement from all parties
Example: Do we have buy-in from
the tech department on the new customer service software?
Convergence: The coming together of two or more disparate disciplines or
technologies such as TV and the Web
Example: The convergence of TV
and the Web helps make TV more interactive.
Drill down: To go into a Web site below the top-level. Also, used to
describe delving deeply into a project, question, or issue.
Example: To find
corporate bios, you’ll have to drill down into the site.
Eyeballs: Visitors to a Web site
Example: We’ve added content to
attract more eyeballs.
Functionality: How a site works. The ability of a website to provide
services.
Example: Interactive tools can add to a site’s
functionality.
Hard-wired: Naturally born or made a certain way and unable to change
Example: He
is hard-wired to create controversy no matter how much he tries to avoid
it.
In that space: In that industry. Also, can refer to a person’s job
function.
Example: Monster.com is in the career/job site space.
Example: She’s in the network
management space.
Integration: Generally used to refer to the bringing together of two
different, but often complementary, technologies
Example: The IT department is
working on the integration of the Oracle and Microsoft SQL databases.
Internet time or Internet speed: Doing business at a breakneck pace.
Another way of saying, "we needed it yesterday."
Example: We need employees who
can work on Internet time, not slow bureaucratic types.
Let's download: to get information
Example: Make sure to download
with John from IT on the new tracking system.
Let's upload: to give information
Example: I’ll be away during
the meeting, but upload me when I get back so I’ll know what’s going on.
Mindshare: Having a piece of people’s consciousness
Example: In the
e-commerce battle, companies are all competing for mindshare.
Newbie: Someone who is new to the Internet and online culture
Example: Can you
believe that newbie spammed everyone in the office with a bad joke?
On the same page: To understand where everyone else is coming
from
Example: I hope we’re on the same page about the site redesign.
Offline: In private, outside of a meeting
Example: I don’t
think everyone needs to be in on this. Why don’t we discuss this offline?
Robust: Hardy, resilient. Often used to refer to technology
applications.
Example: This new e-commerce back end is far more robust
than the last one. Now customers can save their personal information for the
next time they order with us.
Pre-IPO: A company before going public on the stock market
Example: We are pre-IPO now, but we’ll be going public sometime in
the first quarter.
Sticky: An adjective used to describe sites that have content that
attract and retain visitors. A relocation site that offers a moving calculator
is stickier than one that doesn't because visitors do not have to leave to find
a resource they need.
Example: We need to add some useful tools to our site to
make it stickier than our competition.
Strategic fit: The action being contemplated will further the business
plan. Often cited as a reason for partnering, buying or taking over another
company or organization.
Example: We’re buying Widget.com because it’s a
strategic fit.
Sync-up: Share current information; understand each other. When used as a
noun, suggests a meeting.
Example: Let’s get together this afternoon and sync-up
on the Smith report.
Synergy: Collaboration and cooperation. By far, one
of the most overused buzzwords.
Example: We feel that
there is a great deal of synergy between our two management teams.
Usability: According to Jakob Nielsen, an expert on
Web usability methodology, usability is "the measure of the quality of the user
experience when interacting with something -- whether a Web site, a traditional
software application, or any other device the user can operate in some way or
another. It makes sense to talk about the usability of a water faucet: Can you
immediately figure out how to turn it on? Do you burn your hands?
Example: A well-placed navigation bar/menu can add to our site’s
usability.
Viral marketing: Describes any strategy that encourages individuals to
pass on a marketing message to others, creating the potential for exponential
growth in the message's exposure and influence. Off the Internet, viral
marketing has been referred to as "word-of-mouth," "creating a buzz,"
"leveraging the media" or "network marketing." But on the Internet, for better
or worse, it's called "viral marketing." (source: Dr. Ralph Wilson,
www.wilsonweb.com). Viral marketing may be done through discussion groups, email
lists, and message boards.
Example: We didn’t have a big budget so we relied on
viral marketing to get the world out about our company.
Win-win: Both parties walk away happy. Generally used as a negotiating
tactic to get one side to buy into something.
Example: Hiring
Susan is a win-win for her and our team.
There are plenty buzzwrods you don't see on this list that you may be curious about. For more check our Buzzword Buffet.
Two other good resources for figuring out exactly what a buzzword means are:
Whatis.com and
Webopedia.com.